Catalyst

Posted on Thursday 11 May 2006

So I’m out back the other day, last Thursday to exact, swinging a 40+ pound solid steel rod against a tree. I’m giving it all I got. Beating the everliving CUH-RAP out of that tree. Blowing out years worth of angry. I’m swinging. And hitting. And swinging. And raging. And swinging. And sweating. And swinging. And cussing. And swinging. And slobbering. And swinging. And screaming. And swinging. I’m sure the neighbors thought I’d gone full-bore spastic bozo. As I’m nuttin’ up, and spraying testosterone and stressballs everywhere, a little voice in my head said something… “Do you realize you’re bending this steel rod with your bare hands. Dude I’m Impressed.” And so was I.
Then in the midst of all the raw emotion, heavy metal swinging, primal cuss words, flying ropes of drool, and internal conversation– I farted, and laughed until I couldn’t breath.

It was a Hallmark Moment (for the criminally insane).


11 Comments for 'Catalyst'

  1.  
    May 11, 2006 | 1:25 pm
     

    Uhm-hi-fyi-he wasn’t mad at me-just if one wondered….

  2.  
    JB
    May 12, 2006 | 6:57 am
     

    I was curious… whew! Thanks, Les! :-)

  3.  
    May 12, 2006 | 8:19 am
     

    Dayum, son! Sometimes you gotta work out your aggression. I used to have a cedar stump in the front yard, and every time I had a shitty day I’d go out and pound the hell out of that thing. Eventually we got a pickup truck and pulled it up by its roots, and I realized the source of my frustartion was that damn cedar stump!

    Funny how things work.

    *toot*

  4.  
    cw
    May 12, 2006 | 10:44 am
     

    That’s why you gotta love the South. If we’s angried up, we go’un beat ourselves a tree.

    As you work through your issues, I hope you’re eventually able to skip all the preamble and just sit on the couch and fart. It seem to work for me. Scares the dogs though.

  5.  
    Anonymous
    May 12, 2006 | 11:38 am
     

    I like the tree-beatin’ therapy idea. i may go buy several people i know tree costumes.

  6.  
    sis-in-law
    May 12, 2006 | 6:44 pm
     

    Sounds like a good “cleansing your soul” moment, but of course I latched on to the hysterical fart-laughter and I’m reminded of the times I’ve blown a big one by accident in a public bathroom (with no one in there, of course) and I can’t stop giggling because I farted, then I can’t stop giggling, not because I farted loud, but what if someone walks in while I’m giggling by myself in the stall!

  7.  
    Jim-in-law
    May 12, 2006 | 11:42 pm
     

    Could you smell it?

  8.  
    nita
    May 14, 2006 | 7:01 pm
     

    you’re my hero and i’m totally buying the house next door to yours!

  9.  
    May 15, 2006 | 2:40 pm
     

    [...] ol, and internal conversation—I farted, and laughed until I couldn’t breath. Blunderland » Catalyst   [...]

  10.  
    Snowy
    May 16, 2006 | 9:20 am
     

    hockey stick + black rubber disk is my agression outlet. but i think i might like yours better.

  11.  
    Anonymous
    May 16, 2006 | 1:26 pm
     

    Hey–was that photo taken at “Sonny’s Bar-B-Que”? Oh, wait….that’d mean they’d misspelled “lunch.” Never mind.

Leave a comment

(required)

(required)


Information for comment
Name and email are not required anymore, until some spammer gets in here and pisses me off. Then I'll want a blood sample. Please consider what you're posting, or I'll find you and spray paint your car.

Use the buttons below if you want, whatever you do, just don't press the red button.


RSS feed for comments on this post | TrackBack URI